
Photo of Autumn's spectacular homemade breads by Ken Williams for The Concord Monitor
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We’d like to start off today’s column with a little quiz: Can you guess which of the following questions the Fru Gals dread the most?
1. Mom! Where do babies come from?
2. Mom! Can I take your car to Boston to go to a concert?
3. Mom! Today is my class party; did you make the fruit salad?
Those of you who selected the third question have most likely experienced the overwhelming panic caused when one of your kids looks up from his Cheerios and casually mentions the commitment you made weeks ago but forgot to write down. Your plans for the morning ruined, you immediately go through all five stages of the Kubler-Ross grief cycle:
Denial: That party can’t be today. That party is on the 26th. Wait, today is the 26th?
Anger: I hate fruit salad. And kids.
Bargaining: I’ll just slice a banana into the two cans of that fruit salad packed in heavy syrup that Darling Hubby bought in 2003 because they were On Sale. I’m sure no one will notice.
Depression: This probably means I need to get bowls too .
Acceptance: Good thing I wore my yoga pants to bed because I’ve got to be at the market when they open if I have a prayer of pulling this off.
It’s some weird amalgamation of maternal guilt, peer pressure and sense of duty that compels the American Parent to grab the clip board and sign up to help apply make up at the school play even though we don’t do such a hot job on our own faces. We don’t have any time, and precious little talent and still we find ourselves obliged to volunteer. And it’s a good thing, too, because without volunteers, nothing in this town would get done. At the risk of giving our mothers credit, they were right when they told us that little things mean a lot and many hands make light work. Keep chanting that when you find yourself ironing 35 cloth napkins at 4:30 in the morning for the school staff appreciation luncheon so those dedicated professionals can get an inkling of the immense gratitude we feel for everything they do. And besides, you can sleep when you’re dead.
After all our years of reluctant volunteering, we have a few coping skills we like to call
The Fru-Gals’ Rules for No Muss/No fuss Volunteering:
Frozen ground beef can be anything you need it to be: International Country Night? Add some tomatoes and peppers and make American Chop Suey—because America is a country too! Boy Scout Jamboree? Add some beans and refrigerated biscuits and rustle up a Cowboy Pie! Book club reading Corelli’s Mandolin? Sauté the beef with oregano and a handful of olives, wrap it in frozen Phyllo dough and call it Greek Surprise!
Fake it if you can’t make it: Run out of time to make cupcakes? Buy them from the grocery store and do a frosting swap: scrape off the hot pink swirly mess they came with and add slather on your own frosting. Replate onto a decent looking platter. Bonus points are awarded if you also buy a little clamshell of strawberries and dot the platter with them. No time for even that? Grab a box of little Debbie brownies and smush them a bit as you open the little plastic wrappers and throw them on a plate. Screw the strawberries.
Divide and Conquer: If you find yourself in charge of an event, break it down into tiny pieces so that you can delegate lots of small tasks to a large number of volunteers. If the people you contact can’t commit to bringing a main dish, they might be willing to pick up a box of coffee from Dunkin Donuts, or iron 35 cloth napkins. Just make sure to send out a reminder or two in the week leading up to the event or you won’t sleep a wink the night before.
And the most important rule of all: Do not over-commit: No matter how many time slots are still available, sign up for only one. When Robin’s kids were tiny she volunteered to work in the church nursery on Sunday mornings. Five years later she emerged from the basement amazed at how clear the organ sounded when not muffled by the cries of 25 toddlers. Also? Hiring a babysitter so that you can volunteer your time is insane. There, we said it.
The recipes this week come directly from our most recent volunteer event: coordinating the Staff Appreciaiton Luncheons at Kimball/Walker School. With the help of a wide array of cheerful volunteers the dedicated and hard working teams of both schools were treated to an impressive buffet, which we think is French for “nothing matches”. These dishes are great choices for pot luck events because they are delicious and portable, but there is no reason not to add them to your family menu too.
Kristin’s Fiesta Salad
Beautiful, delicious, portable: the perfect pot luck salad!
1 red or orange sweet pepper, seeded and cut into half inch chunks
1 pint grape tomatoes, halved if large
1 15.5 oz. can black beans, rinsed and drained
8 oz. frozen corn, defrosted
1 bunch scallions, chopped (white and green parts)
1 avocado, cut into half inch chunks and drizzled with a little fresh lemon juice to keep it from turning brown
1 head of iceberg or romaine lettuce, chopped into bite sized pieces
Thin tortilla strips for garnish (optional, but they add a nice crunch...add these RIGHT BEFORE serving, otherwise they get mushy)
Layer a large flat platter with the lettuce then make Cobb Salady stripes out of the peppers, tomatoes, corn, black beans, and avocado, as in the photo. Sprinkle the scallions over the entire dish. Add the tortilla strips before serving. Serve the dressing on the side, or wait until everyone has oohed and aahed and toss with the dressing.
Kristin’s Killer Chipotle Dressing:
1/2 cup chipotle barbeque sauce
1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons cider vinegar
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 teaspoon fresh ground pepper
1 tsp. kosher salt
1/4 cup roughly chopped cilantro or flat-leaf parsley
pinch of sugar
juice from 1/2 lemon
6 dashes Chipotle Tabasco (optional)
1 c. canola oil
Add everything but the oil to a food processor (or blender) and turn it on. Slowly dribble in the oil while the processor is running. The dressing will emulsify to a thick and creamy texture. Thin if necessary with more oil.
Rebecca’s Blissful Cranberry Coleslaw
Crisp, refreshing and loaded with veggie goodness.
1 1/4 cups dried cranberries
4 cups broccoli florets cut into small bite-sized pieces
4 cups packaged coleslaw mix with carrots
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1/3 cup onion, minced fine
6 slices bacon, crisp-cooked, drained and crumbled
For the dressing:
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1/2 cup sour cream
1/4 cup sugar
1 tablespoon vinegar or more to taste
In a very large bowl, combine broccoli, cabbage, walnuts, onion, and bacon. Stir together the dressing ingredients in a small bowl. Drizzle over broccoli mixture; toss gently to coat. Cover and chill for 2 to 24 hours. Just before serving, gently fold craisins into salad.
Note: During the fall this is great made with 1 ¼ cups fresh cranberries. Just chop the fresh berries and combine with ¼ cup sugar before adding to the salad ingredients. Throw in a handful of raisins if desired.
Autumn’s Fennel Breadsticks
Worth fiddling with yeast and water temperatures. Seriously.
Adapted from A Montana Table by Seabring Davis
½ cup warm beer
½ cup warm water (110 degrees or so)
1 ½ teaspoons instant yeast
2 1/2 cups bread flour
¾ teaspoon salt
½ cup olive oil
3 tablespoons fennel seeds
1 egg
¼ cup whipping cream
Mix beer, warm water and yeast and let sit until it bubbles, about 10 minutes. Add flour, salt olive oil and fennel seeds, then combine in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with a dough hook or knead by hand until smooth. If dough seems sticky add a bit more flour. Place dough in a well-oiled bowl and let rise in a warm place until doubled in size, about an hour. Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment or waxed paper and then grease with cooking spray. Flatten dough to about an inch thick and cut into 1 inch wide strips. Pull strips to make sticks about 12 inches long. Place the sticks on the prepared sheet. Whisk egg and cream together and use a brush to coat each stick. Sprinkle with additional kosher salt if desired.
Bake for 15-20 minutes, until golden brown.
Chuck’s Homemade Hummus Platter
Adapted from America’s Test Kitchen Cookbook
Far better than store bought Hummus, and frugaler too!
(1 ) 15.5oz can chickpeas, rinsed and drained
¼ cup tahini, thoroughly stirred
¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil
¼ cup water
3 cloves garlic
¾ teaspoon sea or kosher salt
Pinch cayenne pepper, or more to taste
3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
Mince the garlic in a food processor. Add the rest of the ingredients and process until smooth (about 1 minute). Transfer to a serving bowl and chill overnight. Serve cold with an assortment of veggie dippers, crackers and breadsticks.
